My friends and I have a frequent debate about whether Tastykake is superior to Little Debbies, and it seriously makes me question their taste/sanity/whether they have enough intelligence to urinate in the toilet. Little Debbie's is the top of the snack cake evoluntionary chart. Let's look at the facts. Little Debbies:
1. Swiss cake rolls - delicious chocolate cake rolled up with cream and coated with more chocolate
2. Starcrunch - chocolate rice crispy crunchy cookie covered in caramel
3. Oatmeal creme pies - everyone's favorite
4. German chocolate cookie rounds - a samoa that you don't have to buy from a girl scout
5. Christmas tree cake - the best part of Christmas besides Jesus
6. Nutty bars - peanut butter layered between wafers and covered in chocolate....mmmmm
7. Zebracake - cake striped like a zebra! can you believe it!?
Tastykake's selection of goodies?
1. Butterscotch krimpet - cake covered with gooey butterscotch frosting
2-10. Cake cemented over with ______ - flavored frosting that sticks to the wrapper
Q.E.D.
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4 comments:
Do you remember the scene in "Honey I Shrunk the Kids" when they find an oatmeal cream pie? Ever since then, I've always had fantasies about being tiny and in the presence of my favorite foods...as long as I don't have to wrestle ants or scorpions. Seriously, though, who has scorpions in their front lawn? I've never thought about that before. That seems slightly unrealistic.
1. Swiss cake rolls - these things are disgusting
2. Starcrunch - never heard of these
3. Oatmeal creme pies - sounds healthy
4. German chocolate cookie rounds - i hate germans
5. Christmas tree cake - i'm jewish
6. Nutty bars - i'm allergic
7. Zebracake - i hate animals
I don't know how we can even be friends. Tastycakes are a classic tri-state area dessert. I grew up on these. When I was in elementary school, my dad would put a package of two butterscotch krimpets in my lunchbag, and i would unpeel them carefully so that none of the frosting stuck to the plastic. And then I would eat the frosting and throw out the cake. Because I don't really like cake. That is probably the only happy memory I have of my childhood.
I'm hungry.
tastykakes are only loved by people from jersey. they're wrong. that's all.
zebracakes, YUM!
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