Monday, March 3, 2008

Tastykake is Nastykrap

My friends and I have a frequent debate about whether Tastykake is superior to Little Debbies, and it seriously makes me question their taste/sanity/whether they have enough intelligence to urinate in the toilet. Little Debbie's is the top of the snack cake evoluntionary chart. Let's look at the facts. Little Debbies:

1. Swiss cake rolls - delicious chocolate cake rolled up with cream and coated with more chocolate
2. Starcrunch - chocolate rice crispy crunchy cookie covered in caramel
3. Oatmeal creme pies - everyone's favorite
4. German chocolate cookie rounds - a samoa that you don't have to buy from a girl scout
5. Christmas tree cake - the best part of Christmas besides Jesus
6. Nutty bars - peanut butter layered between wafers and covered in chocolate....mmmmm
7. Zebracake - cake striped like a zebra! can you believe it!?

Tastykake's selection of goodies?

1. Butterscotch krimpet - cake covered with gooey butterscotch frosting
2-10. Cake cemented over with ______ - flavored frosting that sticks to the wrapper

Q.E.D.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Do you remember the scene in "Honey I Shrunk the Kids" when they find an oatmeal cream pie? Ever since then, I've always had fantasies about being tiny and in the presence of my favorite foods...as long as I don't have to wrestle ants or scorpions. Seriously, though, who has scorpions in their front lawn? I've never thought about that before. That seems slightly unrealistic.

craziasian said...

1. Swiss cake rolls - these things are disgusting

2. Starcrunch - never heard of these

3. Oatmeal creme pies - sounds healthy

4. German chocolate cookie rounds - i hate germans

5. Christmas tree cake - i'm jewish

6. Nutty bars - i'm allergic

7. Zebracake - i hate animals

I don't know how we can even be friends. Tastycakes are a classic tri-state area dessert. I grew up on these. When I was in elementary school, my dad would put a package of two butterscotch krimpets in my lunchbag, and i would unpeel them carefully so that none of the frosting stuck to the plastic. And then I would eat the frosting and throw out the cake. Because I don't really like cake. That is probably the only happy memory I have of my childhood.

I'm hungry.

Anonymous said...

tastykakes are only loved by people from jersey. they're wrong. that's all.

Anonymous said...

zebracakes, YUM!