Change your life, Part 1

Two years ago I had a life-changing experience: I saw the movie Last Holiday at the Bridge. It stars Queen Latifah as a lonely department store worker who, due to a wacky medical mix-up with a secondhand MRI, believes she is dying. She throws off the shackles of her calorie-counting, penny-pinching existence to live her last few weeks at the glamorous Hotel Poop in order to meet her culinary hero, Chef Didier (played by a seemingly-drunk Gerard Depardieu). Then, mistaken for a federal investigor, she teaches a bunch of rich people to live, gets a makeover, goes base jumping, and has her secret crush (played by a cardboard cutout of LL Cool J) track her down and tell her that she is not actually dying. There are also cameos by Emeril Lagasse and Smoky Robinson. If you can not see why this movie is awesome, I feel sorry for you.